Monday, January 3, 2011

JOY to the world!!!

WOW! I cannot believe it's been more than a month since I've blogged!

Well, not really.

It WAS December...the month of nothing to do!!! LOL

We had a wonderful holiday season, and I hope all of my friends did too. For the first time in 6+ years, we stayed HOME! It was amazingly relaxing. We were wakened by the pitter-patter of a small stampede of children shortly before 8 & the jolly festivities began. There were plenty of ooh's, ahh's, "oops, I think this was for you", laughs & even a few sentimental tears. The rest of the day was spent totally relaxing. We played with our new toys, napped, and stayed in our jammies till late in the afternoon.

Christmas evening, we had my folks & our sweet neighbors over for soup, snacks & games.

I think the thing I will remember most about the 2010 Christmas is that it was
As usual, at this time of year, I find myself pondering the meaning of life. Ok, well, maybe just the direction of mine. Am I the only one who does a quick assessment of where I am & whether or not I'm happy here?

Probably not. I happy here?

Yes, I believe I am.

I have reached a place in my life where (finally) I am ok with who & what I am. Oh, don't get me wrong...I'm in no way perfect or even remotely close, but I am secure with my decisions & where God has brought me. I truly love my life; it's chaos, it's bumps, it's financial instability...all of it.


Why would anyone love a crazy life with 8 kids, no regular paycheck, disorganization, clutter....?

I know why.


I have joy in my heart.

Joy does not = happiness. However, you CAN be terribly unhappy about a situation & still have JOY in your heart. Please, don't mis-read this...I am not unhappy. LOL
But, there are aspects of my life which are, shall we say, less than my perfect ideal.

Years ago, I did something foolish & it ended up in a broken window ( I don't remember the circumstances). I really felt badly about it, and was afraid of what Lloyd would say. The next day, I looked at the cardboard that my sweetie had used to cover the gaping hole til we could replace it, and on it he had written, "DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF...and it's ALL small stuff!! :)"
I cannot tell you how that affected me.
I might have even cried (that's big for me).
That little cardboard saying spoke straight to my heart! It told me that, yes, the situation wasn't perfect, but the world didn't end...and...he loved me in spite of a bad decision.
My God is like that, too.

He loves us in spite of our poor decisions. Our grumbling. Our pouting. Our anger...all of it. When we learn to realize our place in God's heart...we have...JOY. And that knowledge, that joy, is what carries us through some of the darkest places in our lives.

I have been in places in my life where I didn't feel joy, but, upon consideration, I realize it is because I assumed that I had fallen out of that place in God's heart. A situation that was all in my mind.

Let me ask....

Do you have JOY?

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